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eat my bullets!!!!!!

enough...is enough.
if.....i......get......ONE more junk email that reads:

'thank you for your loan request..'

i will hunt them down,
i will find out where they live,
and i will systematically maim and/or kill each and every last one of them until they cannot stroke even one....measly....computer key.

and then...oh, yeeeeees.....i will kill all of their children...and THEiR children's children, on down the line...until there are.....noooooooo....more.


then........i'll wash my hands, take a breath...(maybe even grab a quick bite) theeeeeen....skip t'my lou and do a big ol' happy jig.

but, before all of this...
i might just take out a loan to buy firearms to complete said task..


( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
Nov. 11th, 2006 11:03 am (UTC)
thank you please
yes. i know what you mean.
i have a bit of a spam problem myself

I am Polina. I am a vivid and emotional person who doesn't like lies.
I love people and I appreciate when they are sincere with me because I
am a sincere person too. I like traveling, enjoy the nature and the
life. As every woman I am mysterious and like tender flower I blossom
under the rays of love.'

Nov. 12th, 2006 01:15 am (UTC)
Re: thank you please
hey, polina seems like a nice enough gal...albeit a bit hopped up on the loopies with all that hippy/blossom talk....f'yask me, i'd think twice about punching the delete key on someone who likes 'the nature AND the life..' (*cough*...what a catch)
Nov. 11th, 2006 02:59 pm (UTC)
Nov. 12th, 2006 01:50 am (UTC)
see, here's the deal...i am SO lame..
i had to google 'LMAO' (that's*laughing my ass off,* for those as abbreviationally challenged as myself..a.k.a.*also known as* the OTHER AD...'abbreviation disorder') cuz, aside from LOL, (which only kinda fucks me up cuz it resembles AOL) acronyms puzzle me...all i can do is stare at them (and drool) hoping they'll eventually materialize in my mind, like those damn pixelated pictures that reveal an image the longer you look at them.

either that, or i just sit there and try to make other phrases that make sense in a completely nonsensical way.


leotard mangled and OUch
loin makes ass ovulate
little men and omelets
love me angry omen

(which incidentally, crosses over into a great band name game)

...see what i mean?
i could do this....all....day.
k. i need a life..

Nov. 12th, 2006 01:34 pm (UTC)
I think this is, hands down, the funniest "I don't know what the hell that means" explaination I've ever read. I'm glad this wasn't read during a coffee sipping moment because there would be a terrible mess. ::winks:: Perhaps because I do know all these acronyms, plus have an arsenal of smilies, it is *I* who needs to get a life. [I've been trolling the Internet since 1994 . . . it didn't occur to me exactly how long that's been until just now. OMG]
( 5 comments — Leave a comment )

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