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mum's the word....

just got off the horn with my mumzee.
it's 4 something a.m. my time......7 something hers.
i haven't slept a wink, she was just getting up.

the first thing she said was.......'hhhhhhhi, but what's WRRRRRRONG?!!!!'

yup.....she read me like a book. i'm SO NOT a morning person....she called it like she saw it. she KNOWS i'd rather stay up till noon than wake up at 4am.

all i thought was:

the last time i called her like this was when i was in complete desperation. my dad had recently remarried, my 'non smoking' step mom was yanking frozen ciggies outta the freezer and chain smoking all of a sudden because she couldn't cope with me anymore?????? yup.....i was a bee-yotch alright.....buuuuuut, that was my JOB at the time! after aaaaaaall, i was six fucking TEEN.

i was the last of 5 kids..........all siblings had moved away (and mom remarried and moved away, TOO) and i eventually cried bloody murder.....wanting her to cross state lines to be with me, once again. *sigh*

yeah, i wanted my mama......and who the frick wouldn't?

i'm such a dork, baby.
forever more.

only this time, this call, i DiDN'T cry......
i just wanted to hear her voice.
i just shut my stupid, idiot, dumb mouth...... long enough....to hear hers. her sober, soothing, soft voice.

to me, that's as good as it gets these days.

it's like hearing the beatles for the first time.

or seeing a humming bird take nectar from a feeder that's right outside your bedroom as you wake up.

you're never too old to be read a bedtime story.
and you're never too old to hear a lullaby.....


( 11 comments — Leave a comment )
(Deleted comment)
Aug. 17th, 2007 10:48 pm (UTC)
yes, and keep that in your thoughts through the teen years!!!
Aug. 17th, 2007 03:15 pm (UTC)
this struck a chord with me.
sometimes just hearing my mothers voice is enough. fixes everything in an instant.
i know she has her own drama to deal with, only because she taking care of everyone else in the family. so i don't burden her with all the details of mine. all i really need from her is to hear her voice. i think she appreciates that.
Aug. 17th, 2007 10:46 pm (UTC)
what a sweet daughter you are!
Aug. 17th, 2007 04:31 pm (UTC)
i love a good lullaby too. and really... are there any bad ones?
Aug. 17th, 2007 10:52 pm (UTC)
yeeeeeah, there's something very primal about them. a very loving ritual... :)
Aug. 17th, 2007 07:00 pm (UTC)
Aug. 17th, 2007 09:42 pm (UTC)
I'd give a lot to hear my mom's voice again, or feel her hold my hand. No dork you.
Aug. 17th, 2007 10:41 pm (UTC)
aaaaaw....big hugs!
Aug. 18th, 2007 02:52 am (UTC)
and you're never too old to want to be mothered...
Aug. 18th, 2007 03:16 am (UTC)
you know it!
( 11 comments — Leave a comment )