May 2nd, 2008

baby pony

i hate waking up in the mourning


i can't help it.....
she's in my every thought.
she's been with me longer than my mom raised me.
if she were a human, she'd be going off to college this year.

i think chuck instinctively knew she was on her way out.....he took multiple pictures and videos the day before she passed......

but, i was bracing myself for the last year or more....waiting for her to bid farewell. i was hoping (and yes, i guess praying) she wouldn't go the way wylee did 5 years ago.(2.18.03 entry)

jozee just kept coming back after every ailment: failing kidneys, vestibular disease, weakened liver, and finally a tumor on the heart.....just like the energizer bunny....she fought it, like she was jacked up on crack n'coffee. and somehow that resilience made me believe she would outlive us all......but, all good things must come to an end i guess. and jozee was one of the greats.

when my ex-husband kallen and i first adopted jozee and her brother wylee (shown below) from the pound, we brought them home, full of anticipation and naiveté.


the first thing jozee did was sniff, skitter and squat on our newly bought white carpet.

although i wanted dogs dearly, i threatened to return them only after one week.....and i'm so grateful i didn't.......cuz ultimately i knew we were all young....dogs and humans alike. we needed to adjust and grow with each other, regardless of how many stains collected on the floor.

it's funny how much those damn dogs taught me about life.....

and here i thought *i* was their parent.